If It Happens Again #BehindTheBlogger

If it happens again. what exactly you may be asking. well, let me tell you.

In April 1995 exactly 22 years and 2 weeks ago my whole world went topsy turvy.

It all began with what we all assumed was food poisoning. It was a beautiful April day. The 5th to be exact and I was driving home from a field trip. Yes, I said driving I did that once upon a time long ago.  When I started feeling nausea you know the kind of feeling you get when you eat too much or haven’t eaten in a long time.  I really didn’t think anything of it until the next morning when nothing would stay down and I began to have left-sided weakness.  By the time hubby got home I could barely walk.

We made a trip to the E.R. where I admitted for four days and treated for food poisoning. I returned home feeling better or so I thought.

Within 48 hours I was experiencing the same symptoms. I return to the hospital where I would stay for 4 more days as the doctors would run tests. Soon I would feel better and be sent home with a diagnosis of possible flu but really nothing concrete.

Again within 48 hours you guessed it, I would once again experience the same symptoms only this time the weakness was left-sided and by the time I get to the E.R. I am not ever aware of where I am. The doctors immediately admit me without haste and put me in a room to start the days of testing.

Only it would be in the night in a room that life would take a devastating turn. While the nurses are giving me my even meds I begin to choke. Within minutes I stop breathing. My last know memory of that night is me being rushed down a hall as light fly by above my head and air being pushed into my lungs I would slip into darkness.

I would sleep like Aurora from Sleeping Beauty for 2 weeks but sadly no prince will kiss and awaken me. I would awake thought to tubes and machines and knowledge that not one part of my body is capable of moving.  It would also be from this moment on my true test would begin as I try to reclaim what once was my life.

If It Happens Again

Though this is only one of the many battles I faced in the past 22 years it was hard. Was it the hardest no there was one other but I am not yet ready to share that as it is not only heartbreaking it was a very dark time. But this battle was hard.

Not only the coma and waking from it but the long journey ahead was hard. The many hours of physical therapy, the testing and just being in the hospital for 6 months was a test.  Then being diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis was devasting. I feel blessed and grateful to be alive, to be able to walk and talk as the doctors said I would not do any of that again but facing a life of unknown is hard some days. To wake each morning not knowing if you will be able to move or talk is scary or to go to sleep at night not knowing if you will wake up is even scarier.

However, I think to myself if this were to happen again would I be able to survive it again. Would I have the strength to fight my way back or would I just give in?  I would like to think I would fight just as hard but in truth, I am not sure I would have the strength of my youth. Back then I had the mindset fo the young and the feelings of immortality. Now I am older and I have turned down more than one dance with death and in truth if he came and asked I am not sure I would turn him down this time.

But for now life goes on and I am thankful for each and every day I open my eyes to the dawn of a new day.
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About Rebecca 2177 Articles
Rebecca is a boy mom, traveler, Disney addict, chocolate lover, and tea drinker. She lives in Florida and enjoys good food, good music, and a great book. Her goal in life is to live in the moment and to always be open to new things.

20 Comments

  1. WOW this kept me spellbound wondering what happened to you and why. I had to physically keep myself from looking ahead. 🙂 Sad this IS I’m still wondering .. lol Did I miss something or did you not give the reason for your illness? Very interesting story – And I also didn’t know about Behind the Blogger Hop and I’m going to check it out.

  2. OMG Rebecca, what a devastating experience. I am so glad you’re here to tell the story and I hope you’re never again faced with the decision about whether or not to fight. But if you are, please keep fighting.

  3. Having something like that happen seemingly out of nowhere must have been a scary experience. Gosh, two weeks! I very much hope that nothing like this happens again.

  4. Holy cow, I knew you had medical issues, but nothing like this! I believe that YES, if it did happen again you would fight your way back! Look at all the amazing things that you do with your writing, with your family and how many people you touch daily. Thank you for sharing your story. Always fight!

    • Thank you. I will always fight daily but i admit some days are harder than others. I hope to continue to tell my story with my writing now that I have started.

  5. This sounds so, so scary Rebecca. Did you ever find out what the cause was? I once had a mystery illness that was never diagnosed. Not anywhere near as bad as this sounds though. But I had a short spell in hospital. I sincerely hope that this NEVER happens to you again.

    Louise x

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